May 29, 2007

The Weekend Wrap-Up

Mini Red wanted to address each of you and thank you for your support but we’ve run out of time this weekend. Thank you for the support it is very much appreciated.

Tuesday morning I will be driving her to school and talking to the counselors. I don't see a need for the two girls to talk and want to know that the school will be taking care of the situation.

Cross your fingers for us.

This week begins another phase for me and that will be another college course. In my first class I earned an A (a/k/a 4.0). Wahoo! This next class is condensed to 8 weeks and therefore twice a week. This will be tough because each class consists of lecture and lab bringing each class to almost 5 hrs.

So if the posts are few and far between this is why.

This weekend Mini Red saw “The Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End”. First, she saw it with her Dad and again today with me at the Uptown. I’ve asked her to write a review so keep an eye out. Then again she has a busy week herself including the last concert of the year and ending the week with a Nats game.

I hope everyone had a fun, safe Memorial Day weekend. I for one am not looking forward to work tomorrow.

May 27, 2007

A tough start to the long weekend

The plan was to leave for the beach after dropping Mini Red at her dance at 7pm. Her Dad would pick her up after the dance since it's his weekend to have her.

The plan got all turned around when I got a teary call from Mini Red around noon. A former friend of hers created a Mini Red hate list and had kids sign it. Mini Red knew of the list and was told many kids were bullied into signing it. The list was found by one of the adults and the initiator and the names on the list were in trouble. What really upset Mini Red wasn’t that all the kids were begging her to get their names off the list so they wouldn’t be punished but that some of her friends admitted to willingly signing it. She broke down and my heart still breaks writing this. I didn’t care about anything but getting to her and taking her out of that place. I said, “Tell them I’m coming to get you!”

I booked it out of work and called her Dad as I was running to the car. He was heading to the school to support Mini Red. Then I called my Mom and she was all fired up. She said “Tell Mini Red to skip her Dad’s this weekend and come to the beach cause I want to hug her big and spoil her”.

I got to the school and I wasn’t worried about anything more than hugging Mini Red and protecting her. I talked with a counselor briefly but Mini Red wanted to get out of there. By the time she got her stuff from her locker and we were in the parking lot her Dad showed and she got more hugs.

After all this there was no way she was going to the dance so we headed home to gather her things so she could leave with her Dad. I mentioned several times about coming to the beach but she wanted to go to her Dad’s. I was disappointed but hopefully her Dad will give her some tips on how to handle these situations in the future because he can be sarcastically mean and conniving. To watch her leave with him is always difficult even after all these years but after all that had happened it was even more difficult this time.

So I headed to the beach much earlier than expected. The drive wasn’t too bad and traffic only tacked on about another thirty minutes to the three hour drive. Once I arrived my family was all huggy after the day’s events and when Mom, Sis and I were talking about it we all got a little verclempt. Mom is disappointed Mini Red didn’t come to the beach but we agreed it’s a good sign she wanted to go to her Dad’s. Mom is fired up and wants to make sure the school does something about this situation. She's ready to go into the school and get in their face if necessary but suggested I call SIL to get her take on it since she’s a teacher.

SIL gave some great info. As I had suspected I can’t know the punishment of these kids or if they will be suspended from the field trip next week. I can however go with a different angle and for any of you with kids this is great advice. SIL said to contact the school and explain that as Mini Red and I are discussing what has transpired that there are consequences for actions. Mini Red needs to also be aware of this so she doesn’t make the same mistake. What are the consequences determined by the school district for such actions? Plus tell them that I need to let Mini Red know that the school will protect her. I also plan on pointing out that this is bullying and this should bring alarm to the school that a child could behave in such a manner to rally many kids against one.

SIL says it’s all how you pose the question and to not be afraid to ask the policies and what the school will do. She says the school will cater to the parent that asks questions.

The school counselor told me they tried to have the two girls sit down and talk but Mini Red was too upset. They plan on trying this again on Tuesday but I don’t see the point. Maybe if they were in Elementary school but what this girl has done is irreversible and there is no way they can’t be friends at this point. This proposed meeting could be uncomfortable for Mini Red and what would the bully do other than be nice to try to avoid any punishment. I refuse to have Mini Red in this situation and I don’t feel it’s in her best interest.

Friday was just exhausting and I feel empty since Mini Red isn’t with me. I think I could just hug her for three days straight. I’m leaving the beach Sunday to get her so we can have Monday together. Our plan is to catch the new Pirates movie at the Uptown and she is excited about the plans for her weekend.

May 24, 2007

Just the Facts... 8 of them... Random

Tish tagged me (better late than never, eh?). Love to ya Sistah!

The Rules:

  • Players start with 8 random facts about themselves.

  • Those who are tagged should post these rules and their 8 random facts.

  • Players should tag eight other people and notify them that they have been tagged.
  • The Eight:
  • I went to an Opus Dei High School. No, I didn’t join. Yes, I’m OK.

  • I welcomed the year 1994 partying in a bar in Korea.

  • I have a freckle on my lip that I have come to regard as quite sexy.

  • I can imitate several accents. I just have to hear a few words and I tend to be able to run with it. This always drove my Mom nuts.

  • I used these accents to create characters that interacted with Mini Red and taught her life lessons. Mini Red used to tell people that Cruella DeVille taught her how to make her bed.

  • I love the show “The Girls Next Door”.

  • I’m learning how to do a loud whistle from a website. I practice while driving.

  • I shave my legs, pits, etc pretty much everyday. I prefer to be smooth and can’t stand the slightest bit of stubble on my body. My hope is to one day afford to get Alased.

  • If you'd like to do the meme, leave me a comment so I can check it out!

  • May 22, 2007

    An office-wide email received today

    Every one who has a laptop if you could please send me the following information on it:
    1.) Make/Model
    2.) Cereal Number (underneath the laptop)
    3.) Company Bar Code (if it has one)[underneth the laptop]

    1.) Make/Model: Two Scoops
    2.) Cereal Number: Raisin Bran
    3.) Company Bar Code: Kellogg’s

    Hahahahahaha! I needed that!

    May 19, 2007

    Pretty in Red

    About a week ago I had a meeting with Mini Red’s teachers. One of the comments they made was that Mini Red reminds them of Molly Ringwald in the movie “Pretty in Pink”.

    I mentioned this to Mini Red and was informed that this is one movie she has not been introduced to. So the other night I was at Target and found the DVD on sale for $7.50. HELLO! That’s my kind of price so I grabbed it.

    This morning Mini Red and I slept in a bit, not-to-mention neither of us knows how Mini Red ended up in my room. I guess we were beat after our night out to see Shrek 3. I would give you some sort of review but I fell asleep in the middle of it.

    Anyhow, Mini Red and I are watching "Pretty in Pink" this morning, while in our pjs. It’s amazing how much Mini Red looks like Molly Ringwald. Although, I do believe Molly Ringwald has PSUAcoustician's nose. I’m feeling very nostalgic and old watching this.

    Here's my favorite scene:

    May 16, 2007

    Craigslist Missed Connections

    I love checking out these Missed Connections. Every once in a while you see two people that have posted about each other like these two. The sad thing is you never get the 411 on the outcome.

    Nats Game Monday Night--Blue button-down - w4m - 25
    I was sitting in the M-20s with my friends. The field was in front of you, but you turned in my direction an awful lot... I thought you were adorable, but you dashed off after receiving a phone call.

    You had dark hair, sitting with two guys.

    I was going to say something to your friends who were left, but they booked it after the end of the game.

    If you see this, email me so we can go to a game together next time.

    Location: M-20s

    Nats Game Monday Night - striped blue and gray sweater - m4w - 26
    you were sitting a couple of rows directly behind me wearing a blue and gray sweater, white button down shirt and blue pants. You also had a light brown handbag. It seemed you were just there with friends.

    I guess you caught me turning around a couple of times and we made eye contact. I tried catching up to you but the crowd didn't let me.

    It's a long shot but hope you see this and are as interested as I am.

    Location: Nats game


    Then there are all these missed connections for a hot Redhead near the Washington Post recently. I keep responding telling them I’m not near the Washington Post Building but they keep posting.

    Actually, I’m thinking of heading over that way to check her out one day.

    May 15, 2007

    We almost had a no hitter

    Dad had tickets to tonight’s Nats game against the Braves and asked Mini Red and I to join he and Mom. I was itching to make it to a game and my company didn’t get tickets this year so I made sure the folks knew I was interested in going.

    The metro ride there was irritating to say the least. There was constant waiting to clear the track, or whatever, on the Red line as well as the Blue line. It’s a good thing we got an early start.

    The seats were great and we had room until the three rows in front of us showed up. They all obviously work together and the company was paying. The beer guy even commented that he loved this section. A few times Dad and I tried to get in on a free beer from them but no luck.

    The game was awesome but there weren’t many hits. In fact the Braves had no hits and we thought we were going to have a no hitter but that all changed in the 8th inning. It was outta the park so to speak. Dad was disappointed because he thought he was going to get to witness history. In the end the Nats won 2 to 1, which makes four consecutive wins

    I was watching a game the other night and the batter crossed himself before each time he was about to swing. He did it so fast that some might not even notice it but it’s his lucky charm I guess. You know baseball is one of the more superstitious sports and I have to wonder… When does a player say enough is enough with a superstition? Do you keep wearing those lucky unwashed socks when the fungus on your feet is getting out of control? When do you say this superstition isn’t working anymore? If it isn’t working anymore do you stop or just add another element to it? I bet it’s all like OCD on steroids, huh?

    May 14, 2007

    Mother's Day weekend in review

    Friday was a jam packed day! After work there was a family BBQ for a little one’s birthday and they had some awesome food. The weather was great and it was nice to visit outside while the kids played.

    My sister was heading to The Harp and Fiddle to meet up with some friends and I was going to meet up with some of my friends. This was the first time my sister got to see Scythian live and as always Scythian didn’t disappoint. Just check out the photos.

    It wasn’t til later on in the evening I saw the drummer at the bar. Mrs. M and I approached him for a photo op. He said he needed a drink first so we waited... And waited… I said, “Forget it I’m not gonna stand here like an idiot. I don’t need a photo that bad.” Living in DC you do see celebrities every so often and the thought of approaching anyone is out of the question in my book. Liquid courage is the only reason I have gone for photos with Scythian and definitely isn’t my thing to do. I definitely won’t be asking for any more photo ops or worrying about completing the set. Mind you this doesn’t change my status as a fan.

    I finally arrived home about 2am after a trip to Tastee Diner. At this point I had been up for over 23 hours and need some serious sleep and sleep I did. I slept til 12:30 the next afternoon. I felt much better.

    Saturday afternoon brought a housewarming BBQ for my sister’s at her new place in Glover Park. Her place is great and it just reminds me she isn’t so little anymore. She is 13 years younger than me and the baby of the family. I think Dad has the hardest time with her growing up. They had a great turn out of family and friends. Most of the neighborhood is young and someone is always having a party. I couldn't help but feel bad for one set of neighbors who were trying to have a romantic meal in their back yard and we had this party going on. On top of that the Cornhole game going on in the back alley was getting rowdy because Dad was kicking everyone's ass.

    The only pictures I took there were of the mating ladybugs. They had a view of the game and were getting it on. At least sex is happening somewhere.

    Must be 18 years or older to view the photo below.
    Sunday brought Mother’s Day. Mini Red was brought home early and we fueled the car and picked up breakfast and were on the road by 10am. We made it to Kings Dominion by 11:30 and we couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day. I rode the Hyper Sonic and this is when I realized I should have worn my sports bra because I almost gave a nice view to those cameras they have on those rides. Good thing I brought it along just incase and Mini Red and I detoured out to the car so I could change and we could get on with the rides. She was a good look out while I did my quick change in the back seat. This made the rest of the day much easier to have the pups in check.

    The drive back up 95 was slow but in the end we made it home in 2 hours. I couldn’t have asked for a better day and I believe this is the best Mother’s Day on record and I was sure to let Mini Red know. I wish this kinda day for everyone.

    It was a great weekend filled with Family, Scythian, Mini Red and roller coasters. Who could ask for more?

    May 11, 2007


    At Flanagan's Harp and Fiddle!

    Dubbed by The Washington Post as "one of DC's most energetic and eclectic bands" Scythian (sith-ee-yin) falls nothing short of a "party band". Their high-energy, adrenaline-peddling, interactive brand of music has one goal in mind - to get people on their feet and dancing. The crowd is an essential element of each show and Scythian relies heavily on crowd participation to get people involved and loosened up. As The Washington Post states, their results are always the same: ""the band's enthusiasm is contagious, and shows seem to end with everyone dancing, jumping around or hoisting glasses." Led by a pair of young raging fiddlers, Scythian has a great respect and admiration for the traditional - the foundation of their music; nevertheless, Scythian is not afraid to wink at convention in search of a little fun, lending them an appeal to young and old alike.

    Maybe tonight I can complete the set and get a photo with the drummer????

    I know... I'm such a dork!

    The Sign helped when I had to deal with the Crazy

    Even though I was up early (all night) I let Mini Red sleep a little. When I got her up I forewarned her that I had no sleep and why. She put on her robe and looked out on the balcony over at the loud boys who were still out on their balcony.

    We did our usual morning rush around and got out the door at a decent time. I dropped her off and she was walking over to the bus stop when I saw it. It was a sign… a good sign. It was Walking Man and he walked right past Mini Red. She hadn’t even seen him but I promptly pointed him out. Even Mini Red knew it was a sign that it was gonna be a good day.

    I was now off to work and a lot less grumpy but lately, the traffic into work has been a bit on the heavy side, at least in Maryland. DC hasn’t been so bad except for one person this morning and that was the Horn Happy Ho. I was about to turn off Connecticut Ave when I hear this obnoxious horn. She didn’t want to let a car in but the car need to get in our lane so he could turn. This isn’t the kind of driving you would expect from a driver of a VW Green Beetle plus this Beetle had a really obnoxious sounding horn.

    We continue down to Rock Creek Parkway and I left room in front of me because I knew this one car would need to get over since his lane was ending. But the Horn Happy Ho wasn’t having it and blew her horn at me. I gave her the “Are You Nuts!” look via my rearview mirror but I don’t think she got it because I had my sunglasses on. As soon as she could she got around me and was trying her damndest to move along as fast as possible but she got stuck at the light. HAHAHA. I could hear her honking that horn again at someone else because she didn’t think anyone was moving fast enough when the light turned green. I switched lanes to see if I could get any closer and maybe this would be my first time to ever flip someone off. I realized that if I did get close enough I wouldn’t flip her off because she just wouldn’t get how special it was.

    She was flitting back and forth between lanes and looked ridiculous and I swear all the cars around her slowed just to piss her off. I have to admit I did the same and enjoyed watching her frustration. Finally, on Memorial Bridge she was able to get around everyone and shoot ahead. I was still hoping to catch up to her because I thought it would be really cool if I snapped a picture of her while driving next to her. No such luck I was off onto GW Parkway and she headed to Arlington Cemetery.

    I love seeing people like this. It really puts any of my own road rage in check because I don’t want to look as idiotic as they do.

    Inconsiderate Neighbors

    I have been up all night due to my loud neighbors. Last time I told them to "Shut Up!" from my balcony.

    This time I will be contacting the rental office.

    I have also written them a note that I will slip under their door:

    Please be advised that I will be filing a complaint with the rental office due to your excessive noise all night long. This is the second time I have had to deal with the noise and on a weeknight. Next time I will just call the Police.

    Personally, your rap rendition of “My Effing balls” is not the sound I want wafting around my child’s ears as she sleeps.

    Your Tired and Cranky Neighbor

    So I'm fickle about my waxer, shouldn't I be?

    Frida Kahlo

    On our way home from Mini Red's swimming I decided to stop and get waxed. My eyebrows and upper lip that is. My hair is fair and hardly noticeable but I do this for me.

    There's this one place I go and all the girls there are nice and I like the job they do. No matter how much you prepare yourself for that strip to be ripped off it still shocks you. Usually the girl will put pressure on the spot recently traumatized by pressing on it. Surprisingly, this does help.

    Today I had the same girl I had last time and I swear this one is a masochist. She won’t apply the pressure once she rips the wax off. Last time she made the comment that that my eyebrows are uneven as if this is a bad thing. No one is even check out your boobs cause I'm betting they aren't even either, honey! This time when she was finished she looked at me and commented on how red I was. Of course I’m red! I have fair skin you nim wit.

    I think I’m ready to find a new place for the waxing. Maybe I’m fickle about my waxer but that’s my prerogative.

    On another note…

    I had a bit of a fit with FN tonight. I asked about picking up Mini Red early on Mother’s Day and he offered two hours earlier than usual meaning 3pm. What is the use in that? The day is already gone. Well they had planned a barbecue and he didn’t even think about the fact that I’m the Mom and its Mother’s Day. He said I should have said something earlier. What am I supposed to do, tell him to help Mini Red do something nice for me for Mother’s Day? Shouldn’t that be a given?

    He has since moved his family barbecue to Saturday and has now offered to bring Mini Red home real early, rather than me picking her up, so she and I can head to Kings Dominion on Mother’s Day.

    I’m much happier now.

    May 9, 2007

    Can you see my ass in this?

    I recently bought a new dress. I don’t have many skirts but I really don’t have any dresses because they don’t work well on me due to my heavier top half.

    I tried on at least 10 dresses last Saturday and was really happy when I found one. It’s white with black flowers all over it. I’m a little uncomfortable and self conscious since this is not my usual, but I’m digging it.

    I stepped out of work to run an errand and felt some stares. That’s when it hit me... My dress might be a bit see-through in the sun. Oh Shit! Nothing I could do at that point so I quickly finished my errand, raised my head high and got back to the office pronto.

    Once back I informed Trish of my concern of this see-through dress. We looked around to see if there was any place the sun was shining through but unless I climbed on top of the desk and stood at the window we were out of luck. So Trish grabbed the lamp off her desk. The problem is it wouldn’t reach the floor so I held it upside down behind me. Trish moved to the other side of the room to see if the light shined through.

    Looks like I was worried over nothing and the dress doesn’t appear to be see-through. We plan to get outside later and check it out for real.

    Thank goodness for girlfriends, eh?

    I’m Done!

    As in:
    Accomplished, a wrap, all in, all over, brought about, buttoned up, compassed, complete, completed, concluded, consummated, depleted, done in, done with, down, drained, effected, effete, ended, executed, exhausted, finished, fixed, fulfilled, over, perfected, performed, realized, rendered, set, spent, succeeded, terminated, through, used up, wired, wrought.

    I'm talking about my first credited college course. That is… Until the next class which begins May 29th.

    Since the Summer semester is condensed I’ll have this class twice a week, 6 to 11 pm, for eight weeks. I was a little nervous signing up and committing not only myself but Mom but we all know what we are getting into. I finally signed up last night and it’s a good thing too since there was only one seat left.

    I have a few family members that recently needed help with their computers and I’m usually on-call for them. I have forewarned them there is a chance I might be calling them for help with Mini Red while I’m at class. This wasn’t my intention when I was helping them but hey why not?

    May 7, 2007

    I think The Undertaker is in town

    Today, Mini Red and I (along with the rest of DC) decided it was a good day for the Zoo. It was the type of weather where you keep taking your sweatshirt on and off. The shade was real cool but the sun felt good and the indoors were real warm.

    We went into the small Mammal house and when we came out I got Mini Red an icee thingy. We moved to the side so I could put my sweatshirt back on and this big entourage of scary looking people goes walking by. They were lead by this HUGE dude who was being very loud.

    This evening I’m doing a little searching to find out who this guy might be. He kinda looked like some wrestler. I found that the WWE Smackdown is coming to Baltimore and looks like it was just in Virginia. I found a pic of The Undertaker guy and Mini Red and I think this was the dude we saw at the Zoo today. This is when she tells me he was carrying a stuffed prairie dog under his arm. Evidently, he looked right at her and said "I CARRY MY PRAIRIE DOG WITH PRIDE!" I don’t know how I missed that since I was standing right next to her. Maybe I was pulling the sweatshirt over my head at that moment.

    Did anyone else see this guy?

    May 6, 2007

    I’m in a funk and you, my lucky readers, are who I’m going to complain to. Part III

    Part III: Mother's Day

    Mother’s Day makes me kinda sad. Mini Red is at her Dad’s that weekend but I’m gonna try to get her back early.

    My first Mother’s Day there was a necklace I wanted that said “MoM”. I told FN at least a month in advance that I wanted this necklace and how much it was and where to get it. I was looking forward to Mother’s Day because I curious to see how it felt. Mother’s Day was always important to me because it was the one day to really let Mom know how much we appreciate all her hard work. When I was younger I would often times bring Mom breakfast in bed. Even though I couldn’t cook anything I’m told I once brought her bread (un-toasted) and jelly. Sometimes we would go do something after church but as we got older Mom’s request changed and she just wanted us to do yard work with her and Dad. This is when us kids did most of our yard work.

    I was so excited when I woke that morning because that year it was my day too. FN knew what I wanted and I was expecting a cooked breakfast or breakfast out. He did go and get doughnuts and then at noon we went to the store to get the necklace for me. I was disappointed that he hadn’t gone and gotten it on his own but I still had high hopes for the day. We got to the store and he watched the baby so I could get my purchase but I couldn’t because they were sold out. No Mother’s Day gift for me on my first Mother’s Day. I had hoped he had at least planned something to celebrate this day but he didn’t. We went home and it was like any other Sunday. I was disappointed.

    I love that I’m a Mother and it is the best thing that has ever happened in my life but this day to celebrate my Motherness has never quite been as expected. I guess it’s hard to articulate what I’ve expected and I must sound like a whiney baby but you can’t help feeling like you feel. Mother’s Day is about my Mother not me and I can’t help but feel it will never be my day.

    This is the last part in my three part funk rant, although, I could do another about work but I won't. As you’ve probably noticed I turned off comments for these three rants because I’m not looking for anything else other than purging this out of my system. Just writing it made me feel better although I’m a bit nervous about it really being OUT THERE. Then again it is my blog and I’ll do what I want to.

    Thank you for reading and thank you for, hopefully, not judging. I’m off to nag Mini Red to clean her room so we can do something after her religion class. I guess this is my unofficial Mother’s Day.

    May 5, 2007

    I’m in a funk and you, my lucky readers, are who I’m going to complain to. Part II

    Part II: Boys

    I’m so tired of being alone. I know this is partly my fault because I’m terrified of ending up in anything similar to the relationship I had with my ex husband. It used to be that every guy I met had something that reminded me of him.

    Then I met Cool Guy and it was wonderful but I feared it going away. It did… in a snap he disappeared. I was a blithering idiot and I begged him to leave me a message just saying that it was over but he wouldn't. For some reason he wouldn’t give me that closure. Something happened in his life and he went in a cave and disappeared and caused me a lot of pain.

    After that no one could compare to him and what we had and I compared future dates to him but didn’t realize this til later on.

    Next I dated Hot Older Guy to get over Cool Guy. He was hot and older and I felt guilty because I was dating him for the wrong reasons. He had some serious issues like smoking, drinking (A LOT) and some anger issues. The anger issues were never directed towards me but having me around seemed to tame them. We only dated for about three months but dated again a year later. This is when I found out his great grandfather was a serial killer. Not just any serial killer… He was the guy they based Hannibal Lecter on. It all made sense now and we stopped dating but we stayed friends.

    At one point I threw myself into online dating and that was both comical and scary. Yeah… No more online dating for me. Then I really hit a dry spell cause I didn’t (I don’t) know how to meet anyone.

    I started talking to Ladies Man online but not by way of any dating site. It was just happenstance. We were getting to know each other and he was unlike anyone I had ever known but we hadn’t met in person. He had a long vacation planned and we were going to finally meet when he got back. I was anxious and ready to “shoot my wad” so to speak in anticipation of us finally meeting to see if there was a spark. Then I got the email. He had talked about me so much that an old girlfriend got jealous and was finally ready to maybe do what it took for them to make it work. I was dumped before it got started. I was crushed and I was amazed that a dude I never met could hurt me like that.

    So the dry spell continued and I realized that when I finally meet someone it will probably be after we have gotten to know each other in some non stressful environment and down the road maybe start dating. This is what happened with Awesome Guy. I was attracted to him but I wasn’t sure and I actually thought he might be too nice. My wishy washiness about him was all in my head but he enveloped so much of what I was hoping for in a guy. We had a professional relationship so there was no way anything could happen between us. The professional relationship ended and a few weeks later he called and asked me out. It was all I could do to control my excitement but I felt I had been holding so much in waiting for this time for him to call that it should be easier to handle now. Our first date was a movie and drinks and we could talk in a more relaxed atmosphere. Our second date we spent the day together and gradually got closer throughout the day and finally had our first kiss. What an awesome kiss it was too! We had a third date and spent the day together and that too ended with a fabulous kiss. That was the last time I saw him. It all seemed to be going so well and I’m still sad over this and it’s been almost two months now. Sometimes I think maybe I’ll hear from him again but I think I was given a line and that’s it.

    I think dealing with a dude disappearing is getting easier for me. Everytime I think a guy is different I realize they are pretty much all the same. They say nice things but in the end there words are empty. Maybe that sounds sad or bitter but I think it’s just the reality that must be faced.

    So I keep up my guard because of the amount of times I have been let down and this makes it more difficult for the next dude that comes along. Not knowing what happened and having no control seems to be the name of the game in this world.

    I’ve met someone else who is a really nice guy and he wants to date me. I want to have all these romantic feelings for him but I’m just not feeling that way about him. I have been open and honest and even told him about Awesome Guy. He is willing to be patient but I’m afraid it just isn’t happening for me. The last thing I want to do is treat him the way I have been treated but I have been open and honest and at this point I can’t be responsible for his feelings. Some of those other guys can’t say that and they are responsible for hurting me. I guess I’m responsible for how it affects me after that.

    It is said we have to have these experiences and the pains along with the joys. I just have to try and not let it hold me back because sometimes it’s just easier to hide from it all.

    May 4, 2007

    I’m in a funk and you, my lucky readers, are who I’m going to complain to. Part I

    Part I: Aloneness and Road Rage

    I guess my funk started the other night as I was leaving class. The parking lot had only a few cars but was lit well by the full moon, which had this beautiful aura of hazy colors. The night was quiet and it made me sad because usually I leave class and pick Mini Red up from my parents and take her home and put her to bed. This night I was going home alone because Mini Red was away with her school for Outdoor Ed. It had been a long time since I felt this alone and missed Mini Red this bad. She is off to her Father’s every other weekend and when she is with him for a week I can call her every day and I do. There was no communication while she was at Outdoor Ed and I had to trust these people to take care of her.

    I can’t help but remember the day she was born. It was an amazing experience to go through labor. Mini Red came out and they immediately took her to the other side of the room to clean her up and check her out. At that sweet moment she was born and came into this world I felt so alone. I felt her moving for so long inside me and now there was nothing but hollowness and it was sad. It was the saddest moment on the best day of my life.

    I'm so glad she is home now I can't hug her enough.

    The funk continues as I drove home from work, Thursday, and traffic was horrible. I can definitely get road rageous but it hit me... It’s all about control. We want to be in control of our own lives down to the tiniest part. I figure this is only normal but when you are on the road and you are stuck due to traffic or some other car you are definitely not in control. I’m so tired of being frustrated at these other drivers and there isn’t a damn thing I can do about it.

    It just amazes me the amount of idiots on the road. They come in your lane, take up the whole road, they don’t’ even move when it’s their turn. Oh then there’s the Potomac soccer Moms in their Expeditions that nearly run you over because they are on the phone and no ear piece.

    I will still shake my head at all the Special Ed drivers and hopefully they will feel stupid and learn something but I’m not expending any more energy on this. It’s all about control and we all want to be in control but we can’t. We have to learn to let it go only then can we regain control of our own lives.

    May 3, 2007

    Did you know you can get porn on the Disney Channel?

    Evidently, Middletown NJ kids got more than they bargained for Tuesday morning while watching Handy Manny. They got a few minutes of porn.

    Full Story

    So many things come to mind:

  • Oops I was looking for “Handy Manny” not “Horny Nanny”.
  • Yeah! Free porn!
  • Use it as a learning experience e.g. “This is how Mommy and Daddy made you.”
  • Wow! Manny really knows how to use his hammer.”
  • From my Inbox: How Men use Post-It Notes

    I know women who use Post-It's for the same reason

    May 1, 2007

    I got a new Toy!

    I love getting new toys!

    I got a 500GB External Hard Drive.

    I know... I'm a geek but this thing tickles my toucas.